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Starting Small, Starting Somewhere

It sounds so simple doesn’t it, just get started. But getting started isn’t always that easy. Particularly when you have that niggly shitty imposter syndrome saying ‘you can’t write’, ‘you’re not a writer’ and ‘no one will read it anyway’, and other nonsense along those same lines. It took me about 3 months to even start on this blog because all I did was procrastinate and think about all the reasons why I shouldn't be writing this, rather than just getting on with it and writing.



Struggling to get going

So what holds us back from getting going? Well, research suggests that these are the four fundamental things that get in our way:


Fear of failure


Being too afraid to risk anything means that we reject opportunities for growth because it means stepping out of our comfort zone and stretching ourselves. Staying where we are feels safer. But if you want to change careers or retrain and study, start your own business or even simply make new friends, you need to accept that risk is going to be part of that journey.


“Nothing ventured, Nothing gained”


Lean into uncertainty, be bold and brave, and just take action.


Lack of confidence


Waiting and hoping for things to fall into your lap shows a lack of confidence in yourself. You may sit back and hope that if you work hard enough then your boss will notice and give you that raise you’re looking for, or you will be able to launch that business idea you’ve been thinking about just through hoping it happens. But it doesn’t work like that. Articulate what you want in a way that will show how it brings value to those around you, not just yourself and learn to connect with others.


Working on your own self-development will help build confidence and resilience over time.


Feeling unworthy and the underlying fear of being found out


Do you ever find yourself unable to take a compliment, brush off praise, or poke fun at yourself? It might seem like a small act but over time you are reinforcing the notion that you are unworthy.

Self- deprecating thoughts, inner criticism, imposter syndrome, self doubt, limiting beliefs.. they can all go to hell. Don’t let them force you to shy away from opportunities. Address where this voice has come from, who is saying these things to you and validate it, rather than ignore it, as the first step before you can move forward.


Inability to take action and get it done


Procrastination is the biggest killer of dreams. Being held back by the inability to get out of your own way and take action is the simplest way of explaining procrastination.

Have you ever faced a situation where you want to achieve certain goals but have felt so overwhelmed by the decisions that need to be made that you have chosen to do nothing?!


This fear usually relates back to one of my first points made above.


Finally getting going


So what options are you faced with? Well, by refusing to make a decision, and choosing to do nothing about your current situation, you are stopping yourself from moving closer to your goals. You’re validating those voices and making them louder.


You can press pause by half heartedly doing things and never really getting going. The reality is that being in this constant state of limbo is going to make you frustrated and ultimately lead you to giving up.


When the motivation finally kicks in and you get properly going going, procrastination stops and confidence begins to build as you start making moves towards your goals. Over time, this repeated behaviour makes those voices quieter and you can start to internalise your successes.


So start small, and start somewhere.


What’s holding you back now and how are you going to take that first step to the life that you want?


If you don’t know, then reach out to me on here to book a virtual coffee and have a natter! or you can email me at yasmin@empowher-coaching.co.uk


Key takeaways

  • It’s not about getting rid of those voices but looking at how to use them to your advantage

  • There will always be uncertainty so take risks

  • If you’re vulnerable, it will aid your connection to others

  • Own your value and don’t let fear hold you back from going after your goals



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